I've lost my will to live. I think about suicide 24/7 for the last two years. I've tried to end my life, but I always back out at the last minute. Hanging is very painful, and I feel like I'm going to aspirate the contents of my stomach. Therapy and meds have not helped. I honestly don't want to go on. I don't want to justify why I feel this way, or get help to go on. I just want relief. I want someone to help me end things peacefully. I don't want to traumatize anyone with a brutal exit. Why can't society understand this? I have not wanted to go on living for almost two years. I'm not afraid of regretting an early exit, as (obviously), I wouldn't be around to do so. Does anyone else feel this way? It's unbelievably tragic, but that's the way I feel, and realizing this, everyday, is absolute torture. Please someone, tell me I am not alone. That suicide can be a rational decision in the mind of the person who experiences this level of mental anguish, every minute of every day.